The Caregiver Guide To Chronic PainIf you have the loving task of caregiver to a chronic pain person this is for you. We are all going to have to do this sometime in our life whether for someone in our family or maybe a friend. This isn't easy but it can be done. Do some reading on the particular injury or disease that is causing the pain. Try to envision the pain. You can't! It's impossible... Unless you have suffered from a continuing pain yourself. It is impossible. The person that is suffering knows this and gets frustrated because you don't. Well, you just don't.
There has to be understanding between the pain patient and the caregiver.
If not, the stress will take it's toll on you. You cannotbe there every minute of the day. The pain patient must understand that you have a life, too.I'm not talking about going to parties or just living it up. You need some time to call your own. Even if it's to have your hair cut or go window shopping. We all need space. The caregiver can also get stressed out if kept confined. Being constantly stressed isn't good because you could become ill as well. Then who would care for the chronic pain sufferer. If, there is a family member or friend available for just an hour or so that they can take your place it will improve your mood. Don't let stress build until there is trouble. Pain suffers can be very demanding and mean at times. You don't need to take it personally, even though we all do at times. A Feeling of InsecurityThe pain is stressing them out or a feeling not being able to help themselves. Being dependent upon someone all the time isn't why we are here.They want to feel free and able to proceed with life as before the pain took over. Speaking out and hurting others feelings isn't acceptable and you have to let them know that. They aren't always aware that they have hurt you or others but they need to be told.
Some will feel bad about it and others won't care. But at least, they know where you stand. Tell them you don'thave to stay around and listen to the abuse, that you are there to help them. Some pain patients think of suicide just to end the pain. They seriously need some counseling. I know the pain will end for them but they aren't thinking about their family or the ones that really love them. Reassure them that is the selfish way out. They won't like it but they will live with it. There are ways to control the pain! You don't have to live in constant uncontrolled pain.
Being the CaregiverWe sometimes need to talk to the doctors and find some alternative ways to help deal with the pain.On good days, when the pain is bearable, you can get them involved in something they like to do. A game, movie, or even a hobby they can come back to from time to time. They need to feel like they can accomplish something. Feel useful on good days. Let them do some of the things you usually do for them. You need to give them a reason to get up in the mornings, when they feel well enough. They will appreciate you more as their caregiver, rather than their wife or family member.
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"That hurts me when you talk to me that way". 
