Children And Chronic Pain.

Helping children understand what their roll is

in the family now.

Children and chronic pain causes change in their lives and they need answers.

Questions are an important part of the transition. The answers you give them will be paramount to their understanding.

They need to understand what is happening is important and where they fit in.

Some let change just pass by while others dwell on it. Can you answer questions so they understand what you are talking about?

As long as you are up front and honest, they will feel accepted.

Children And Chronic Pain Understanding:

Here is a list of things that you should absolutely share with your children:

• Tell them what is wrong. If it is back pain, leg pain, nerve pain or whatever it is give it a name. If they don't understand, use a simpler term to describe it.
• Tell them why you are in pain. If it is from a fall, a car accident or from a disease be upfront with them. Explain everything to them. Why you are stressed, sad or even angry. They need to know this, as well.
• Let them know what you think will happen. You may take some medicine that doesn't agree with you and it makes you sick they will want to know why you are sick. If you think that your chronic pain will last a year or two or even a lifetime, they need that information, too.
• Explain how the disease or injury may limit your activities. They will expect things to go on as normal and that can't be. Perhaps, Mom or Dad didn't make it to the ball game or to the dance recital, this is when you realize why the explanation was necessary.

Just as long as they don't feel left out. Young ones will need to feel helpful. Even if they just bring you a glass of water.

The main concern is understanding what is happening, not only to them but to everyone in the family.

Older children will understand more easily, but will likely have more questions than the younger ones.

Children and chronic pain sometimes don't go over so smoothly either. They may become rebellious and resentful.

This could show up with acting out at home or school. First and foremost, they should be included. As we all know, young children have a driving force to be needed.

Ours were in their teens and understood what was happening.

Children and chronic pain will require keeping structure in the children's lives, so it makes them feel more secure. Sometime, during this time, you may have to live outside the home.

This could disrupt the children's lives, but as long as you keep in touch that helps to hold the family together.

Being separated from the family can add stress ---- but children usually cope with stress in their own way.

The feeling of being abandoned is a devastating feeling. Your re-assurance that you still love them more than anything means so much.

Make this separation as temporary as possible. Tell them that you will be back to take them home very soon. This lets them know they are important to you.

Just be patient and supportive, and shift the focus away from the children and chronic pain and/or suffering to other topics.

Shifting the focus will make things seem like situations will be getting better within the family.

Your positive attitude will increase their sense of worth. Get involved in the daily lives of the family as much as possible.

Giving approval and offering support makes us feel good when you get it. Getting rewards and being recognized makes us feel important, even children. And chronic pain sufferers will need to know this.

School is a responsibility and should be approached with a positive attitude. Let them know that this is their job, and that it's a terrific way of helping the family to get better.

Just knowing the facts, children and chronic pain, is the all important thing that will hold the family together.

Also see that, recognizing problems or bad behavior that they are having outside the home are equally as important. Don't just dismiss them as something they are not.

Having a family, children, chronic pain, and staying close will ensure to the children everything will come together.

Return To Families and Chronic Pain From Children and Chronic Pain