Managing AngerAndSurviving Chronic PainManaging anger is one of the many things that chronic pain survivors have to endure. I am sure that you know, that without finding ways of managing anger only makes the pain worse. Coping with pain gives you more time to think, about the situation that you and your family are having to endure. Feelings of anger is a response to the chronic pain.
OK…Lets get on track and start to take back your life. There is never a right time for chronic pain. Some get it early in life, from a birth defect. Others from accidents, twisting the wrong way, from a disease, work injury or any number of ways. No one, deserves to hurt all the time. Sometimes we catch ourselves blaming God for our misfortune. Why God? Why me? Why now? Finding the right care is so important. Whether it will be surgery or a collage of medications. Once the treatment is working, you will get some semblance of life back. This will require extreme patience that you feel you can not handle. 
Pain is something we feel we will never get used to, but time is on our side. Maybe you don’t think so right now though. Learning to manage anger isn't easy. I know. You are mad at the world and everything in it. You don’t know where to turn next. I want my old self back--active, carefree, laughable, lovable self -- back! You get impatient waiting on doctors to find a cure or giving you the ability to help you control your pain. Sometimes, the “control/cure” will take sometime to find the right mix of medications that are right for you. Managing Anger At Home: You are right. Your family doesn’t deserve it. They are there to do what they can to help with your suffering. They love you and are willing to help you through this. As far as taking care of your family, you can’t, if you can’t work. These emotions are the bitter pill to swallow. But, rest assured, things will work out. I had to find work and quick. We were on our last dime and no one was willing to help. I am a proud person and I didn’t know any other way for us to make through. Suffering with chronic pain or chronic illness will bring many emotions with it. Anger is only one of them. Learning how to manage anger will take skills you may not have yet. Counseling will be very beneficial to learn the ways that anger will be of benefit and or hinder your relationship, with yourself and those in the family. The first thing about coping with anger is realizing just what you are mad at or with. Coping with the chronic pain will cause our temper to flare up faster, than before, we were ill or injured. As the pain consumes you, you will become angry just because the pain is taking up so much of your mind.
I know he is not mad at me, but has to let me know how he is feeling. Blowing off steam is good for everyone. What can you do? 6 Ways of Managing Anger: Learn what feelings, other than the pain, that is triggering the anger (e.g. feelings of loneliness, being powerless to control the pain or just that others don't know what you have to endure on a daily basis, etc.) Remove yourself when the anger gets to be too much for you. Take a walk, go to a quiet place, someplace to be alone and think. Do some deep breathing, think before you say something that will escalate the situation further. Remember that you are responsible for managing your anger and any results that remain. Try some funny stress relief. Watch a funny movie, tell some jokes, just get your mind off what hurts and you will find you will feel better. Laugh at yourself for allowing this overtake you mind. It will be O.K. Accept where you are now. Easy for me to say, I am not in your shoes. But… gaining your independence back, even just a little, will make you feel like you have made an achievement. Try managing anger in other ways. Busy your hands, read, play a game, talk to an old friend on the phone. Get your mind busy and keep it there.
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If you need to vent, when managing anger, let your partner know first that you are not mad at them. I have listened for hours about the unfair issues my husband has to endure. 
